Thursday, 28 October 2010

I mentioned in a previous post that J and I went to see Nic Green's 'Trilogy'. Part of the performance was a showing of a film of a 1971 debate in New York town hall at which one of the speakers was Germaine Greer. J and I were both impressed by Greer's speech. Imagine our disappointment then when we learned of Greer's attitude toward transsexuals, as expressed in these excerpts from her book 'The Whole Woman' in a chapter insultingly titled 'Pantomime Dames'.


"There is a witness to the transsexual's script, a witness who is never consulted. She is the person who built the transsexual's body of her own flesh and brought it up as her son or daughter, the transsexual's worst enemy, his/her mother. Whatever else it is gender reassignment is an exorcism of the mother. When a man decides to spend his life impersonating his mother (like Norman Bates in Psycho) it is as if he murders her and gets away with it, proving at a stroke that there was nothing to her."

These are meaningless assertions with no basis in reality. They are gross over-generalisations and like all gross over-generalisations they are absurd. The mother is 'never consulted'? Never? No transsexual person has ever consulted his or her mother? And Greer would know this how, precisely? Stripped of Greer's rhetoric and expressed in plain and simple language the statement is plainly absurd because a) it is highly unlikely to be true and b) as no one has every been present at every discussion between every transsexual person and his or her mother, neither Greer not anyone else will ever know how many mothers have or have not been consulted!  

I will refrain from rising to the bait of Greer's use of the word 'it' in the quote above, as that is so far beneath contempt as to be unworthy of a response.

Where is Greer's evidence that a transsexual person's worst enemy is his or her mother? Where is her evidence that gender reassignment is 'an exorcism of the mother'? Where is her evidenced that a male to female transsexual is 'impersonating his mother'? What does the reference to Norman Bates and 'Psycho' add to her argument, other than to be gratuitously insulting? What do any of these statements actually mean? Where in all of her ranting is there any acknowledgement of the existence of female to male transsexuals? Their existence does not support her argument, therefore she pretends that they do not exist. Neither, apparently, do fathers.

"No so-called sex-change has ever begged for a uterus-and-ovaries transplant; if uterus-and-ovaries transplants were made mandatory for wannabe women they would disappear overnight."

Again, an assertion for which Greer has no evidence. She has no basis for this claim. She would know this how? She has not been present at every consultation, she does not know what transsexual people have or have not asked for. Are we supposed to believe that she somehow magically knows how transsexual people would react to the offer of uterus-and-ovaries transplants if they were available? Are we supposed to believe that she is omniscient? Transplantation of the uterus remains an area of research and experimentation (see the links below) so for Greer to hold it up as some litmus test of the sincerity of transsexual people is akin to accusing migraine sufferers of faking it because they are not queuing up for head transplants.

"As sufferers from gender role distress themselves, women must sympathize with transsexuals but a feminist must argue that the treatment for gender role distress is not mutilation of the sufferer but radical change of gender roles."

I'm not sure quite how, in Greer's head, she manages to reconcile the statement that 'women must sympathize with transsexuals' with her own gross insensitivity and penchant for gratuitous insults. Whatever. I think we will survive without her sympathy. And I don't accept her argument that radical change of gender roles is necessarily the solution to all gender role distress. It is entirely possible that even in a society free of rigid, imposed gender roles, some transsexual people would still need the surgical option. But we do not live in such a society, and unfortunately are unlikely to live in such a society in the near future. Radical change of gender roles is not going to happen in the short term. To suggest that it is the solution for those who need help right now is unrealistic and cruel. 

But yes, yes, a thousand times yes to radical change of gender roles! Stop trying to make me dress the way you think I should, behave the way you think I should, think and feel the way you think I should, on the basis of whether I was born with a penis or a vagina! 

It's amazing the way some people believe their arguments apply to everyone but themselves, isn't it?

Some articles on ovary and uterus transplantation ...


Some articles on Germaine Greer and her attitude to transsexual people ...

Monday, 25 October 2010

went to see Nic Green's 'trilogy' with J on sunday night. it was amazing, lots of fun and thought-provoking and inspiring at the same time. and J was one of several brave women from the audience who accepted the invitation to join the cast on stage and sing 'jerusalem' - naked! i was so proud of her i thought i would burst!

to another friend of ours who was among the cast, you were wonderful, well done you, hope you enjoyed performing as much as we enjoyed watching!

if you get the chance, go see trilogy, you won't regret it!

you can read more about trilogy here ...

http://www.guardian.co.uk/stage/gallery/2010/jan/14/nic-green-trilogy-theatre

Thursday, 21 October 2010

desire is sneaky. it creeps up on you and pounces on you when you least expect it.

and there seem to be at least two forms of desire. there's the very physical, so hard and throbbing it hurts desire, and the deep down emptiness yearning to be filled desire.

it's tempting to call them male and female desire, but that's probably an over-simplification. we probably all feel them both in various degrees.

one is the desire to fuck or be fucked. the other is the desire to be loved. me? i desire to be fucked by someone who loves me.

Wednesday, 20 October 2010

it would be nice to get more feedback. it can feel like i'm talking to myself here sometimes. a few people have indicated that issues with signing in have discouraged them from leaving comments. the problem with allowing anonymous unmoderated comments is that those horrible spammer creatures will pollute your blog with advertising masquerading as comments.

so i've enabled anonymous comments but also enabled moderation. you should now be able to comment without signing in, but your comment won't appear until i approve it. ooh! i have the power! no but seriously folks. i check in here most days, and am seldom away for more than a couple of days, so you shouldn't have to wait long. so c'mon, what are you waiting for? get commenting!

spam will not be approved. constructive criticism will be approved. bigoted homophobic / transphobic bullshit will be consigned to the dustbin of history where it belongs. have a nice day!

Monday, 18 October 2010

wednesday october 20th is 'wear purple day', in memory of those who have been driven into taking their own lives as a result of homophobic abuse. i'll be wearing purple on wednesday. join me?

you can read more about 'wear purple day' here:
http://thenewsoftoday.com/october-20th-spirit-day-wear-purple-to-honor-tyler-clementi-asher-brown/3365/
i had two new experiences this weekend.

the first was rope bondage. surprisingly enough, i've never actually been tied up, as opposed to being tied to something, such as an a-frame or a saint andrew's cross, before. but J has been to a few rope bondage workshops recently and decided to show me her new hemp rope and what she can do with it! she bound my arms behind my back and criss-crossed ropes across my chest. the result was quite flattering! i felt deliciously helpless and vulnerable. i would have liked to have stayed that way for a while, but apparently my arms were beginning to turn purple, so i was only allowed to remain tied up long enough for J to take a few pictures and then she untied me again. 

next up was more needle play. last time J put 40 needles in me, this time it was 105! this was a really intense experience. it's difficult to explain the feeling, each individual needle doesn't really hurt that much, and they only hurt going in (and to a lesser extent coming out). once they're in, they quickly stop hurting. so in theory, there doesn't seem to be much reason why the 105th needle should hurt any more than the first one. but somehow there is a build up of pain - or perhaps a wearing down of endurance? either way, toward the end i was really beginning to think i couldn't take much more. and yet i loved every moment of it! 

all this happened on saturday night. on sunday morning - or possibly it may have been early afternoon, we had a bit of a lazy day - i was introduced to my second new experience of the weekend, a hitachi magic wand! it had a rather more dramatic effect on J than it did on me, but i found it intensely pleasurable too! 

i also got spanked! bare-handed! floggers and paddles and canes and such are all very nice, but there's something exquisitely intimate and personal about a good old-fashioned bare-handed spanking! 

somewhere in the midst of all that i somehow found myself agreeing to a belly-button piercing! we haven't done it, yet, but i've agreed to it! eep!

and yes, i did get to have an orgasm! in fact i got to have two, again, and they were awesome, again. i had to do some serious begging for the second one. i know i'm not going to keep getting away with this, J has already told me how much she enjoys the idea of letting me reach the peak of arousal and denying me an orgasm! and just knowing that she's thinking about it, and enjoying the idea, is such an incredible turn on! i'm experiencing such conflicting emotions when i think about it. it's going to be very hard to take ... and yet .... and yet ...

if you're interested in those rope bondage workshops, you can check out the organisers web site here: http://www.thecinch.org/

Friday, 15 October 2010

getting to that 'can't think about anything else' stage again. chastity focuses the mind wonderfully. want to ensure that your lover thinks about you several times a day? control her orgasms. trust me, she'll think of you!

J is coming to my place for the weekend! this of course does not mean that an orgasm is guaranteed. well, not for me, anyway. i can only hope that she's joking about february!

i'm pretty much guaranteed a good flogging, at least. and i haven't had one of those in two weeks, either. J also mentioned bringing needles, so more needle play would appear to be on the agenda. more scarily, she says she's bringing the humbler!


eep!

Wednesday, 13 October 2010

i'm mostly better at this stage. the sniffles are lingering on, as sniffles do. but the other symptoms are mostly gone now.

this is of course a very good thing. but one of the side effects of getting better is that my body has suddenly remembered that it hasn't had an orgasm in ten days.

remind me again, why did i think this was a good idea?

oh yeah. that's right. the intensity of emotion. and it is intense. few things make me feel owned, under control, quite as intensely as this does.

Tuesday, 12 October 2010

had a lovely dinner with G and S on sunday night. we got to talking about an upcoming needle-play workshop and how we thought that would be different from one-to-one needle play. i described how, when J inserts a needle, i can whimper and not feel the least bit self-conscious about it. because girls are allowed to whimper. and when i'm with J i'm all girl, and that whole male machismo thing just isn't there. it would be much more difficult to get into that mind-frame at a workshop.

the other thing on which G and i agreed is that we need after-care after needle play. if you're gonna stick needles in us, you damn well better make time to cuddle with us afterwards!

Thursday, 7 October 2010

i'm sick.

yeah, yeah, i know, you knew that already, very funny, ha ha.

no i mean i'm ill. runny nose, sore throat, cough, aches in places i didn't know i had places, all that yucky stuff.

on the upside, it does rather effectively distract me from the whole chastity thing.

on the downside, J says that as i'm distracted, it doesn't really count. in fact she says that for each day i'm sick, she's adding a week to the time i have to wait for my next orgasm!

eep!

she's probably just saying that to scare me.

probably.

Monday, 4 October 2010

i got to have an orgasm! in fact, i got to have two! and they were awesome!

of course there's no knowing when the next one will be. J said something about february. she probably just said that to scare me. probably. there was also some mention of finding a way for me to earn time back. i'm not sure if i should be hopeful or scared!

i also got to experience needle play. that was awesome too. it doesn't hurt all that much, certainly no more than the average flogging. but it takes a few seconds to take each needle out of its sterile packaging, so there's that few seconds of anticipation between the insertion of each needle that makes the experience more intense. and of course there's a high level of trust involved in lying there and letting someone insert sharp objects under your skin.

another first was breath play. no masks or gags, just J's hand over my mouth and nose. very intimate and spontaneous, no paraphernalia or preparation required. i loved it. 

Friday, 1 October 2010

i am in thrall, as surely as if i were wearing a physical device. the knowledge of how disappointed i would be, the sense of failure i would experience, is more effective than any lock. locks have keys. anyone who can obtain a key can open a lock. this restriction only J can lift.